What is the purpose of marriage and what's so exciting about it anyway?

Watch the video or see the text below for the transcript. Homework for this session is listed at the bottom of this page. 

Statistics

• 50% of marriages today end in divorce. That statistic rises to above 60% for those who are entering second marriages¹.
• Traditional marriage is under attack with the rise and legalization of same-sex marriage. Many spiritual leaders in America fear for the future of the family.
• The average age of persons getting married has been steadily on the rise from 1950 to 2015².
• 1950 had an age of 22.8 in men and 20.3 in women.
• 2015 showed an age of 29.2 in men and 27.1 in women.
• The popularization of romances with fairy tale endings and modern thought instructing to “follow your heart” has left many wounded.
• The CDC places the average age of most Americans to have sex for the first time at age 17³. Meaning, more and more people are entering a marital relationship with prior sexual experiences.

Finding a Definition

• Merriam-Webster defines marriage in their dictionary as: “the state of being united as spouses in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law.”
• Biblically, marriage finds its base at the dawn of creation when God fashioned woman from the rib of man. Genesis 2:24 gives us the first description of marriage after Adam names Eve “woman”: “(CSB) This is why a man leaves his father and mother and bonds with his wife, and they become one flesh.”
• The Church has also had a working definition in its classical history influenced by the Early Church Fathers. St. Augustine of Hippo suggested that marriage is a part of the natural law of society and has good results. Those results being childbearing, fidelity and trust between partners, and the strength of bond that can only be dissolved by death⁴.
• Therefore, for our purposes we can define marriage as: “The civil and spiritual union of a man and woman before God, witnessed and held accountable by friends and family, for the purpose of advancing the Kingdom of God together and to influence the next generation for Christ.

The Practical Application

• Our Definition of Marriage: “The civil and spiritual union of a man and woman before God, witnessed and held accountable by friends and family, for the purpose of advancing the Kingdom of God together and to influence the next generation for Christ.”  
• Marriage is good and provides a bedrock for society by creating healthy homes and thriving persons. The family can positively influence a community by being peacemakers first in the home and then to their outward community. 
• Marriage is a practical symbol of the sacrificial love Christ has for the Church. 
• Marriage creates strong families which help children thrive and live out their passions and calling as God bestows. 
• Marriage is a covenantal relationship which allows for both parties to love the other unconditionally and completely. Just as God loves you. It is not a place for war but peace. 
• Marriage, no matter what, is to be upheld by all with honor. Hebrews 13:4 (CSB) “Marriage is to be honored by all and the marriage bed kept undefiled, because God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterers.”

• God loves marriage and has ordained the marital relationship to be a blessing to both spouses and society as whole. 
• God has a purpose for your marriage and wants to partner with you in spreading his gospel by using your marriage. 
• God desires that you find joy in each other and thereby express the joy you find in Him! 
• God has a passion that you be radically different from the world in your marriage demonstrate His radical love to the world in Christ through your relationship. 
• So, let’s work together to create a strong foundation for your marriage that can help you weather the storms of life. Commit together that no matter what may come, your commitment to each other before God will not crumble. 

1. Separately, make a list of all the reasons you want to marry your significant other.
   • What attracts you to them?
   • What are your hopes and dreams for your relationship?
   • What scriptures if any relate to your dreams and reasons for marriage?
2. Separately, write a mission statement for your family that encapsulates your dreams for your marriage and incorporates God’s desires for your marriage and family. Do not share this statement with your significant other until later in the course when directed to do so.